This post was contributed by a community member. The views expressed here are the author's own. The game was called "Calvin Ball. I am happy to say that the difficult transition into Daylight Savings Time has resulted into two hours or more of daylight after dinner, and the fantastic weather has driven my children outside to play.
What a concept, eh? Outside to play. I am so proud. Sniff, sniff. Lately, my children collectively known as the Dufflets , have been developing convoluted rules to a game they call "Wall Ball. Before I get into the rules of the game, I have a few things to say. One, the rules of Wall Ball seem variable to me, and rival those of Calvin Ball for their randomness. Two, I have such poor eye hand coordination that it is difficult to believe, after watching me, that my eyes and hands are controlled by the same brain.
Third, I have no peripheral vision whatsoever, a problem which is exacerbated by the fact that I now have a cataract in my left eye which I don't have the time to get fixed. So most things to the left of me look like they are swimming in Vaseline.
Fourth, I'm afraid of fast moving balls. If a ball gets near my face, I panic, because I am aware of my complete inability to catch see "Two" above and thus protect myself from being nailed in the face specifically the nose by the ball.
The only games with balls I can play with any success are golf, because you have an infinite amount of time to line up your shot and think about it and you can be fairly certain the direction the ball will take; and tennis, because, at least with the people who are willing to put up with me on the other side of the net, the ball isn't going all that fast, I have a giant racket with which to protect my face, and the ball is coming from pretty far away so I have time to line myself up.
