But navigating the problem of how to get your end away is one that seems to remain as frustrating and difficult as ever. We can see throughout the annals of history, all of us bumbling about, trying to find pleasure, making egregious errors and awkward messes as we go. So the casual fling is often tough terrain.
Humans are very weird, awkward and sometimes puritanical about sex and, as Australians, we have inherited that British prudishness that can really stop us all having a good time between two or more consenting adults or on our own, of course. Mind games are for hypnotists. Heaven forfend that we might simply vocalise what both parties are already thinking!
It sucks when you get hyped for a boning sesh with someone and it all falls flat. This can be especially tricky if you feel like your particular kinks or desires are unusual, but thanks to sites like FetLife and the post- Fifty Shades of Grey discussions around BDSM, kink and consent, these types of conversations are getting more normalised and mainstream of course, I am talking explicitly about legal interactions between consenting adults here.
This can be trickier with a one-night stand, but it should become easier the more you get to know someone, and having those conversations mean better, more fun sex in the long-term. Falling for someone can be the make-or-break moment of a casual fling.
Billy Joel, as usual, has the best advice here. So much of our anxieties and arguments come from worry, wondering and unanswered questions; we roll them over in our brains, pitch them to the group chat and ask the internet, but transparency is the best overall option.
