To a selfish man with commitment phobia, it might sound like the perfect relationship — a close female friend with whom they can enjoy companionship, shared holidays, a good laugh. All the benefits of a committed relationship, in other words, but with none of the emotional or practical ties. But not as unusual as it sounds.
For a growing number of young women, sleeping with a friend is no longer a taboo but a lifestyle choice. So why would any woman enter into such an arrangement in the first place? Lucy Waterson is one of a growing number of young women in their late 20s and early 30s who have embarked on a Friend With Benefits liaison. She is an example of how confounding it can be to shift from a platonic relationship to a sexual one. The purpose of their meetings is purely physical, and neither harbours any expectation of commitment from the other person.
But, of course, things are rarely so clear cut. So this is hardly a no-strings-attached arrangement. They see each other and sleep together until one of them meets someone else, at which point the physical side of their friendship stops.
Or so the plan goes. It began with a casual fling. They met for a drink a few nights later, one thing led to another and they went to bed. So that is what they decided to become. Except they never quite shook off the physical side of their relationship, without progressing to becoming a proper couple. So Lucy and Doug go to the theatre and cinema together, text and phone each other regularly and see each other at least twice a month.
They liked him, but, understandably, they struggled to understand the nature of his relationship with their daughter. That is certainly the view of Rachel Morris, a psychotherapist specialising in sex and relationships, who predicts an unhappy outcome for Lucy and Doug — and for any other friends in a set-up likes theirs.
